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qwiddityHow to write a novel:
• Create a working title and a summary of your story
• Choose which category (plot-driven, character driven, or epic) and plot type
• Create new characters - define them as either a hero, antagonist or extra
• Describe the places or settings
• Describe any relevant objects or tools
• Describe the storyline chapter by chapter using dramatic principles
Begin writing...
There are problems in the world bigger and older than most of it.
For instance, tattoos and piercings: an existential need to resanctify corporeality in a "virtual" world, or simply entrancing skin adornments? While I'm on the subject if you have clear over several thousands of dollars worth of new tattoos, PLEASE for the love of all that is good don't take up collecting for charity as it just makes you appear a complete tool in public.
If you're really busy and don't have time to breathe, you should try refocusing your chi. When that doesn't work, try refocusing your eyes, that might work better. If by this point you've fallen unconscious because you're still not breathing, wake up and finish this sentence then try refocusing your aura, dendrites, and entire personality.
Since we're fast heading into the silly season of Christmas I'd like to take a break to talk about Easter, a far less culturally absurd phenomenon where instead of remembering a story about a deified baby we all participate in a mass consumer-driven hysteria involving chocolate and candy in the shape of eggs delivered in baskets by a giant rabbit. When I was a child I thought I'd missed something because I was sure that hens, in fact, layed eggs, whereas rabbits only laid baby rabbits. Now that I'm an adult I'm far more willing to suspend my biological disbelief if it means an excuse for gluttony.
Vicarious though this pleasure will be for me next year since after months of not eating chocolate very much I've lost the taste for it. This easter I will probably blow the albumen and yolk out of some eggs and decorate them, then hide them under various bushes around the neighbourhood in order to confuse and disappoint small children hunting for edible treats an imaginary anthropomorph left on the ground. This is one of the few times of year parents remember what it was like to be a child enough to actually encourage their children to eat what they find instead of telling them "Don't take candy from strangers!" like rohypnol isn't their friendly night-nurse in the bathroom cabinet.
• Create a working title and a summary of your story
• Choose which category (plot-driven, character driven, or epic) and plot type
• Create new characters - define them as either a hero, antagonist or extra
• Describe the places or settings
• Describe any relevant objects or tools
• Describe the storyline chapter by chapter using dramatic principles
Begin writing...
There are problems in the world bigger and older than most of it.
For instance, tattoos and piercings: an existential need to resanctify corporeality in a "virtual" world, or simply entrancing skin adornments? While I'm on the subject if you have clear over several thousands of dollars worth of new tattoos, PLEASE for the love of all that is good don't take up collecting for charity as it just makes you appear a complete tool in public.
If you're really busy and don't have time to breathe, you should try refocusing your chi. When that doesn't work, try refocusing your eyes, that might work better. If by this point you've fallen unconscious because you're still not breathing, wake up and finish this sentence then try refocusing your aura, dendrites, and entire personality.
Since we're fast heading into the silly season of Christmas I'd like to take a break to talk about Easter, a far less culturally absurd phenomenon where instead of remembering a story about a deified baby we all participate in a mass consumer-driven hysteria involving chocolate and candy in the shape of eggs delivered in baskets by a giant rabbit. When I was a child I thought I'd missed something because I was sure that hens, in fact, layed eggs, whereas rabbits only laid baby rabbits. Now that I'm an adult I'm far more willing to suspend my biological disbelief if it means an excuse for gluttony.
Vicarious though this pleasure will be for me next year since after months of not eating chocolate very much I've lost the taste for it. This easter I will probably blow the albumen and yolk out of some eggs and decorate them, then hide them under various bushes around the neighbourhood in order to confuse and disappoint small children hunting for edible treats an imaginary anthropomorph left on the ground. This is one of the few times of year parents remember what it was like to be a child enough to actually encourage their children to eat what they find instead of telling them "Don't take candy from strangers!" like rohypnol isn't their friendly night-nurse in the bathroom cabinet.
